Every day there is something we see or hear about that breaks our heart, angers us, and makes hope feel like a million miles away. Things can feel hopeless when you look at the world and feel that you have zero control over anything that happens. The world can feel like a place of self-destruction with no where to hide. Social news feeds and the media thrive on the latest terrible thing that has happened. We are getting informed, but a flood of that negative energetic information can really take a toll on us mentally, physically, emotionally and even spiritually.
How do you find peace in a world that is just nothing but chaos, killing, hate, prejudice, ignorance...?
You find the good. It's still out there.
Balance is essential to having a peaceful existence. If you're weighted down by heavy topics, you need to be lifted up by positive things that also occur every day in the world.
I find peace in nature. I take a walk in a forest and gaze up at the tall trees with thick trunks. The smell of fir trees in the air. I breathe in deeply, in and out. I see the animals and insects in their natural habitat. I squint as the sun beams stream down through the tree branches and feel the warmth and also a cool breeze pass me by. In that moment, I am present and taking in what I am experiencing.
I'm not thinking about how so many forests are being torn down and developed. I'm not allowing negative thoughts of other places to bring down the place I am presently in. I allow myself to feel grateful for this forest and all it has. I take off my shoes and feel the earth beneath my feet and ground myself as I energetically feel in sync with Mother Earth's heart beat. The beat of life itself.
There is a time and place to be informed about the very real and important things happening in this world. I do not ask you to be blind and pretend it isn't reality, because it most definitely is. I'm suggesting to find a healthy balance.
Listen to a baby's laughter. So innocent, so precious. Know that you can be someone to help the next generations thrive. Yes, one person can do great things. You don't have to be famous, have a lot of money, power, authority, recognition to do things that can impact the world in a wonderful way.
Most everyone is familiar with the powerful quote by Mahatma Gandhi, "We must be the change we with to see in the world." I've always been a big fan of inspirational quotes, because they are reminders to awaken our purpose. I'm going to share several more quotes with you now.
"What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you want to make." - Jane Goodall
"We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better." - J.K. Rowling
"Did I offer peace today? Did I bring a smile to someone's face? Did I say words of healing? Did I let go of my anger and resentment? Did I forgive? Did I love? These are the real questions. I must trust that the little bit of love that I sow now will bear many fruits, here in the world and the life to come." - Henri Nouwen
Chaos doesn't just exist in the world around us though, does it? Many times this chaos is in our own personal lives. When you already have stress you are trying to manage, taking on the stress of the world too is not healthy. In fact, it can cause serious health risks.
One thing that helps me is to dip my toes into the chaos without diving in head first. I don't watch the news. It's depressing and I've never felt happier after watching it; therefore, it doesn't uplift my life. People have said, "But, then you don't know what's happening!" Sure I do. I skim headlines. If you're on social media, you can't escape it. Instead of opening every news article and spending time feeling angry, sad, or hopeless - I read the title and get the information that I need. Now, of course, there are times that I do want to read more about something and get in-depth information and that is 100% okay! But, not every day. Not even every week for me personally. You have to find your own balance.
After seeing the headlines and then seeing a photo or two I wish I hadn't on my news feeds (please people stop posting photos or auto-play videos with horrific images!), I then make sure to fill myself with something positive. I think about my family and the love we share. I begin listing things I am grateful for and allow that love to fill me inside out. I think about the people out there actually making a positive difference and try to do my own part.
I've found that many times the people that are so upset with the world are sometimes the ones that do absolutely nothing to help better it. They are trapped in this negative space and energy and all they do is share more bad news and talk with anger about every single thing. It's a rarity to see anything positive on their posts. Even their comments on other people's posts are the sour apple in the mix. Always argumentative or has to stir up CHAOS. Because when you live only in chaos, you begin to become chaos yourself and that's what you're then sharing with others. That's not helping the world, that is adding to the negativity you're so angry about in the first place.
Sometimes, we just have to WAKE UP and force ourselves to find the good and be the good. It's there. It exists. It's what keeps me going every single day knowing that there IS love in this world. There ARE people who are trying to make a positive difference.
If you feel stuck in a negative mind space, you can train your subconscious brain to have a different default thinking than it does now. Mantras help with this. Also known as affirmations. It's a positive, uplifting thought that is to be repeated many times throughout the day until it becomes an inner truth and self belief. Mantras can pull you back into your center and help to ease your mind. Words have POWER. Thoughts have POWER. Mantras help retrain our minds to have a different belief system. One where your mind can be put to ease and where underneath it's not all doom and gloom.
Stay focused on how you can add value to the world each and every day. In Ayurveda, it is called Dharma, and it means life purpose. Every one of us has our own unique mission in life, the reason we are each here. We have an individual gift to be shared with others. It's the script written on our souls.
In moments of chaos, cling to your purpose in life. If you are unsure of your unique life purpose, you can always do life coaching which can assist you with clearly seeing the part of you that has always been there, and will never leave. One purpose you can always focus on is to be and to spread unconditional love.
Remember that the outer world is a mirror to our inner world. When events occur that are beyond our control, we can use tools to remain rooted in our center and remain at peace.
I am awakened to the belief that being "too busy" can be a way to keep you at a lower vibration. If you don't have time for anything anymore, are you really making time for the things that truly matter? When we believe and live a life of scrambling from one thing to the next thing, we are like a hamster spinning inside a wheel. Sure, he's going fast, but where is he really going? If you removed the hamster from that wheel, and he simply walked - taking a break here and there - he would actually get much farther faster.
Internally we can become addicted to being busy. We have to keep moving or else, we die? Or, we're not successful? Or, we will have too much time for idle thought? There are actually root reasons for staying busy and if you're one of these people, I encourage you to dig deeper. I'm not pointing fingers, since not too long ago I lived a life of being so busy I could barely breathe. I was exhausted, yet kept going even though I told myself I had to stop! I actually believed I was trying to stop, but yet I kept finding new ways to be busy. As I weaned off - I believe it's like a drug - I would find myself still looking for things and then lying to myself saying, "But, that won't take too much time! I can do it!" I then had to face the ugly truth and learn how to do things differently.
Some things I just had to let go of. Things that took too much of my time, drained my energy, and provided nothing (or barely anything) in return. At first, I fought it. "I can still do it. I'll just do it less. It doesn't really take that much of my time!" The funny thing is that the things you don't think take much time, once you remove them from your life - you see that they actually take up a whole lot more time than you could have ever imagined. It's like being blinded... you see what you want to see, while others are on the sidelines waiting and waiting and waiting...for just SOME time with you.
Why was I so busy? It was a mixture of things. (1) I enjoyed feeling like I was being successful in life - being remembered for something - not "wasting" my time here on Earth. (2) I didn't know what to do with idle time. I wanted to spend more time with my fiance', yet I would agree or sign up for something that would prevent that from happening. (3) It kept my brain active from having to think about the "tough" things in life or things that I really needed to do.
Sometimes we can keep ourselves from our own happiness. Did I feel like I didn't deserve it? Did I worry I would fail? When I dug deeper, I realized there was a lot hanging out inside of me blocking me from not only my true purpose, but my true happiness. The first step to changing was learning to say one word: "NO!" and truly desiring for my priorities to be the people and things that actually matter!
Stop agreeing to attend event event, do project after project, lose another weekend doing something that pulls you away from what matters. As I began this, my time started to open up and at first I didn't know what to do with it! Like I said earlier, I started to find new things. Amy (my fiance') had to push some tough love on me to help awaken me to the lies I was telling myself. "But, I can do this in my free time, and it won't impede on anything else," I'd say. Finally, after her being firm several times (and meaning it), I stopped.
At first, I felt a bit resentful. "Hey! It's my life... why can't I do this? I've always wanted to..." Then, the truth hit me. HARD. What am I really accomplishing? I was the hamster. Sure, I accomplished many things, but certainly not enough for the time and energy I was putting into it all - not to mention, the time I was away from what really mattered - the memories LOST. I had to start looking at everything I do and see what actually serves a greater purpose in my life.
These are 5 examples of how I narrowed things down:
1. Day job? Check. That is very important. I love my job and it helps me financially to keep a roof over my head and food on the table.
2. Acting? No. That was too much time and energy and also too much ego-focus of "self" for me personally.
3. Writing? Check. It is fulfilling and I only write in phases and it doesn't take time from my personal life.
4. Reiki, Angel Cards, my Spiritual Side? Check. This is super important for myself and I limit what services I provide to others. I keep a safe space and balance. It allows growth in my life.
5. Having an acting studio? No. It took way too much of my time and energy and I could not balance it along with the other things in my life.
I then told myself that I want my weekends to be free. I want Amy and I to have time to do things together, even if that involves staying home in bed and just talking about anything and everything. Quality, precious time that means more than anything else to me. With this extra time, I was able to start being a true PARTNER in the relationship. I have helped more around the house in the past 6 months than I had in 3 years. My main focus now is FAMILY. And now we're able to start adding to ours.
At the end of my life, I had to think about what I wanted it to look like. What did I want to look back on to remember? Did I spend my time living my best life with those I love, or did I spend it fulfilling my own needs and desires to the point of exhaustion.
Exhaustion. I sure was every bit of that word. Mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually EXHAUSTED. Now? I feel different. I'm relaxed, calm, and more patient with people and situations. I'm a lot less stressed and worried and I look forward to being with those I love. I'm able to actually make plans with friends and do things I hadn't done in years.
Am I less successful? Not in the slightest. Now, if I want to accomplish something, I think it through and ask myself what is it really worth?
Recently, I started something new that I had wanted to do for a couple of years. What did I do differently? I hired other people to do it. Now, I sit back, relax and watch that project being created while keeping my free time. Long ago I heard the words, "Work SMARTER, not HARDER" and I couldn't agree more. If I wasn't in a place to pay for that to be done, I wouldn't have chosen to do it. Why? Because when you FINALLY slow down and just STOP - you are changing your life in a way that you will not understand until you fully accept it.
It's not an easy task to wean off the "busy" drug, but it's worth it. You'll fight it. You'll try to add things back. I encourage you to stop and allow yourself to take a deep breath, relax, and just watch the world pass by without you running along with it. Jump out of that hamster wheel, and make REAL progress. Progress that matters.
With much love, light, and gratitude,
P.S. I laugh more now than I have in YEARS. :)
Tristan Star is a certified Usui Ryoho & Karuna Ki Reiki Master, Angel Oracle Card Reader, and Law of Attraction Life Coach. Since 2013, he has practiced intention and manifestation methods with significant results. Tristan is also the designer behind Arcadia Jewelry Art.